Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Holding Steady

So it has been awhile but since my lost post there have been a few storms to endure. My family needed my whole attention and I had so many thoughts going on in mind I wasn't even sure where to begin. Since my last post my hubby unfortunately had a recurrence of the Sarcoma. It was located on his top rib and growing into his lung. Not cool! Fortunately God provided just the right surgeon to do an amazing job. He is still healing and as always I am amazed at his strength. We had a few weeks where we felt life pushing a little hard. These are the days when you have a hard time breathing and at times fighting. Didn't we give this all to God already? Why is this is happening? We both were been feeling tired and as runners we all know what happens when you are tired. You want to quit and start thinking how the heck did I get here? Can someone just come pick me up? Isn't there an easier way to get to the finish line?

                    As you grow tired your form suffers and you are vulnerable to injury. Right?    Since we have been going through this battle for awhile I am more aware of this cycle. I typically call on my friends to pray or pull me out of the dark hole that I know I want nothing to do with.

                   I have to go back to God's Word and believe that his will for my hubby is healing and that we will continue to believe in our miracle.

                   So we continue to weather storms and I continue to love to see my hubby smile! There are little and big moments every day where I say a silent, thank you God!
Enjoying life. Fish On!
Seeing sweet J win a ribbon for showing her pig. Something that at one point we did not know if my hubby would see.

Here we are just starting out. We never would have imagined the journey our life has taken. This picture just makes me smile. My One and Only is just 8 weeks old and this is one of his first smiles on camera. I mean how can you not love the matching butt chin with Daddy. Sooo cute!!
I am feeling called to be with God more but so many times in the day I ignore this urge. I know I need help with this. There are too many distractions that take me away from where I know I want and need to be. Thank goodness He is so patient. Does anyone else struggle with this? 
So where does this leave us and what the heck happened to running?
I am happy to say that right now we get to just breathe and wait until the next scan in October. Praying that everything is clear and we can continue to make all of this part of our HISTORY.
As for running I am on a small roll. I rested most of the summer but did swim and bike preparing for a Sprint Tri. Unfortunately our most recent storm prevented me from making it to the start line due to being in Seattle for surgery. But I am back in the saddle trying to run 3 times a week. My feet are....my feet. I just deal with it.  I have also been completely blessed by an opportunity to work out with a small group of women a few times a week. I love being challenged and watching them grow as well! I plan to stay on track the next 5 weeks as I have a little Nike running date on Oct. 20 in San Fran!!! Thanks to Nuun! More on that later!
Be the light!


Holly said...

Your strength is amazing! Praying for your husband and praying for lots of reasons to celebrate! Stay strong and fight on!

Kris said...

Aww Harmony I feel your pain! I may not know the exact struggle since I have been through different storms but I understand when you say you feel the urge to be with God but have a hard time making it there. Beleive me when I say...Listen and follow the urge. He is your Strength, your Life, your Hope and your Refreshing. I find that even though I struggle with following at those times I just ask Him for strength and He gives. I have realized those urges are for me to be strengthed and refreshed. I used to deal with feelings of guilt that He was disappointed with me if I didn't follow those urges but I know now He cares and loves me deeply and that is not His heart. You guys are continually in my prayers and I am in agreement and I look forward to when this battle is history. He reminds me all the time that He is with me and I will walk through and the same is for you :)

Elizabeth said...

you've been in my thoughts and prayers so much lately...good to see a post from you. and to answer your Q...yes-I feel this way all the time. I need to be more focused on Him but life pulls me in all sorts of other directions. just busy and the day slips away. I just know he is with me always-no matter when I drift. knowing he is always with you and your beautiful family too. xoxo