Well today was the big day. I woke up at 5:00, 5:30 and finally 6:30 and I just had to get up and TRY. I walked a good half mile wanting warm up. Did some light stretching and then began a slow jog. I was able to go a few feet and then realized I was limping and not really running. So I began to walk and mentally gave myself a pep talk. Relax your shoulders, feel your feet, breathe...OK now run. My second attempt didn't last long as the pain was beginning to wrap around my knee and I knew I had to stop. So I turned around and had to walk the half mile home. I began to cry...real tears of anguish. Ugh...my heart was hurting a bit as I felt powerless.
I have been training since mid January and it has been great. My endurance has grown and my speed has increased and I have been feeling myself get stronger. I wanted to P.R. in Seattle, now I just want to be able to run Seattle. NOW THIS???
So I tried to pull it together as I knew if I could just make it to church I would be able to see my sport doc friend again. I hunted him down and told him casually that I was unable to run this morning after 8 days of rest and 4 days of the Aleve magic. He quickly told me that my knee was trying to tell me something and that I needed to get into an X-Ray as soon as possible. I immediately began to cry (AGAIN).
Looking like a dork (ugly cryer) I asked him...Why? Why? Why can all these people run and run and run and seem fine and I am being stopped in my tracks?? He didn't really say much other that my knee is trying to tell me something and we need to figure it out. UGH! The time, the dream, the joy, the determination all seemed to be crashing down at that moment.
I am unsure of my future but I do know that I am a runner. I may not look like one, but this is something I am not going to give up on easily. So please pray for me as I try to get into the doctor and hopefully get the information I need to FIX things.